Doctor vs Janitor
by Matt Garvey
Summary: A mocking joke from Dr. Cox upsets the Janitor. Anything can happen. Please give reviews.


Title: Doctor Vs Janitor  
Author: Matt Garvey  
Summary: When a mocking joke from Dr. Cox upsets the Janitor, allsorts can happen.  
Disclaimer: The characters in this story are the property of NBC. No copyright infringement intended.  
Feedback: Yes please. First fan fiction so please let me know what you think.

_**Doctor Vs Janitor**_

Dr. Cox is stood in his Doctors jacket at the nurses' station talking over his latest irritation with Carla, the head nurse for the floor. His face is taught, making a pained expression

"Is it that time of year again already, Carla? Tomorrow, these halls are going to be filled with new interns that, sooner or later, will look up to me as some kind of higher power… argh"

"You have had this time of year, every year, for almost 20 years around here now. Isn't it about time that you admitted to enjoying interns looking to you for guidance and advice?"

Dr. Cox snarls, his coat flapping backwards with the force of his forward motion, storming away as Carla called "You know I'm right Perry!"

_**Fantasy Sequence**_

Dr. Cox as a new intern himself, walking into Sacred Heart for the first time and being told that his attending doctor is a self obsessed egomaniac by the rest of the staff.

Dr. Cox turns into a man who's looking down at him, snarling with eyes rimmed with a dark red and the faintest scent of whisky on his breath.

_**End Sequence**_

Dr. Cox is still walking down the hall when he spots Ted and the Janitor talking together…

"Say, Tedski" Dr. Cox calls to the resident lawyer "Is there any case if I decide to kill an intern on their first day?"

"Looking to repeat last year again?" The Janitor smiles to himself as he is pleased with his wit.

"At least it would only be the first time, mop jockey. Whether you kill someone by putting too much ammonia in the floor wash or not your years are always the same!"

The smile drops from the Janitors face as he walks away, not saying anything but already wondering how to extract payback.

"I'm still waiting for an answer, Ted" Dr. Cox swirls around with eyes like laser beams into the sad eyes of the lawyer.

"I'd say I think so, but it's been years since I've had a pay rise to pay for new law books"

"Yeah, we all feel for you there" Dr. Cox smiles as he lands his comment, full of sarcasm, at the unfortunate man covered in flop sweat. Ted walks away, head down, looking defeated again in his usual tweed suit.

Mumbling and playing with his suit sleeve, Ted says "Some day I'll get that pay rise, you'll see"

_**End Scene**_

_**New Scene**_

"Ah, Perry. I was wondering if you could do me a favour?" Bob Kelso strolls and stops next to Dr. Cox

"I would love to Bobbo, but, seeing as though I rea-hea-hea-hea-lly dislike you, I'm going to tell you to kindly blow it out your ass"

Cox is smiling as he walks away, towards his locker for his basketball. He puts his white Doctors jacket in it before walking out to the front of the building to shoot some hoops on his own while he has a break and a rare chance to relax.

Cox shoots the ball and we see it flow through the netting of the basket and then him smiling

_**End Scene**_

_**Next Scene**_

"Every year I have to listen to the same rubbish from Dr. Cox" Laverne nods as she agrees with Carla as they're at the nurses' station, both of them both sat down.

"I know what you mean, child" She replies with a slight smile on her face "It is fun to see something get under his skin once in a while though, isn't it!"

"Yeah, I gotta admit, this is my favourite time of the year at work" Carla lets out a small laugh, thinking about last year and how, it seemed anyway, that 2 of his interns had been ganging up on him to see if they could drive him crazy. Carla sees the Janitor out of the corner of her eye.

"Hey, where is Dr. Cox's locker?" The Janitor asks Carla and Laverne on his way past, mopping the floor, trying to make it seem nonchalant

"Isn't his locker the top left hand one of the set by the staff room?" Laverne looks to Carla, who nods in agreement.

"Thanks" The Janitor smiles as he walks away, now able to put the next part of his plot into action having already found time to stick oranges, apples and bananas up the exhaust pipe of Dr. Cox's Porsche

_**Fantasy Sequence**_

"Your years are all the same" Dr. Cox had said. The Janitor had walked away without another word. Stopping at the cafeteria, he had bought 3 oranges, 3 apples and a couple of bananas. He walked away from the till operator without saying a word after paying for the fruit. The next stop had been Dr. Cox's Porsche where he had knelt down and made sure all the fruit had disappeared up the exhaust of the luxury vehicle. "Lets see if this changes your year any!" The Janitor smiles, pleased with his handiwork but knowing it wasn't yet complete.

_**End Fantasy Sequence**_

The Janitor finds himself stood in front of the locker that he had been looking for. Taking his massive bunch of keys from the cleaning cart that he has with him, he extracts the master key for this set of lockers. Opening the locker, quickly taking the Doctors jacket out and closing the locker again, the Janitor races to the hydrotherapy tubs with a light red scarf he had 'borrowed' temporarily from lost and found.

10 minutes later the Janitor replaces the jacket and turning the key in the locker, making it secure. The jacket is no longer dry and white, but soaking wet and a bright pink, the favourite colour of Jordan, Perry Cox's ex-wife. He then takes a stroll to lost and found to replace the scarf that he had 'borrowed'.

_**End Scene**_

_**Next Scene**_

Dr. Cox is furious and we can see a vein popping out of his forehead. "Who's done this?" He is brandishing his newly coloured jacket. His head drops as Jordan Sullivan, his ex wife is suddenly standing beside him "Looks like someone decided she wanted to play doctors and nurses" the jab hits and we can see him turn, storm off with his face reddening more for every second that passes and not all from anger, looking for the Janitor.

Dr. Cox is almost stomping his way up to the Janitor "You did this to my jacket!" he explodes.

"Me, why no!" the Janitor says with a poker straight face and a dead pan voice "But if you think I did, why don't you try proving it, and anything else you think I've done?" His voice and eyes have both darkened, almost threateningly so.

"I will, don't you worry" Dr. Cox turns and eyes Ted walking down the corridor with an armful of files as he passes Jordan who is on her way home for the day. Dr. Cox shoulder bumps Ted and at the same time knocks all the files out of his hands, paperwork going everywhere. "Watch where you're going, flop sweat!" Dr. Cox fumes and carries on walking, knowing that in a half an hours time he will be finished for the day, another gruelling 15 hour shift finished.

Dr. Cox heads for the staff room for the last 30 minutes of his working day to watch his favourite TV show.

The credits end and Dr. Cox stands up, stretches and goes out of the building, heading to his car to go home. He sits behind the wheel of his car and puts the key in the ignition and turns. His car starts, coughs, chokes and then stalls. He turns the key again and the car again, coughs, chokes and stalls. "What the hell is going on?" He tries for a third time and the car doesn't even respond. Dr. Cox gets his cell phone out of his pocket and calls his friend who owns a tow truck to come out and get him. He looks up to see the Janitor driving away in his van, smiling and waving at him. "Oh, you're going to pay for this you soap loving, mop jockeying, bastard!"

_**End Scene**_

**_New Scene - _**The Next Day

A new intern is stood by the main entrance to the hospital, the Janitor up on a set of step ladders with a screwdriver in hand. "Need some help?" the new intern cheerily asks.

The Janitor turns to the intern "No thanks, every so often this door jams and I always find something in there. Don't know how anything gets in there though"

The Janitor goes back to his work but stops as the intern says "Maybe there is a penny stuck in there?"

"Why a penny?" The Janitor asks, always sceptical of the new interns

"Just making small talk, I'm waiting for someone" the intern says feeling nervous, twitching from one foot to another and starting to sweat.

"If I find a penny, you're going down" the Janitor puts the screwdriver to about an inch away from the interns' neck and makes a beheading movement.

Dr. Cox is stood in the back ground with a massive smile on his face "Oh unlucky newbie, a penny is exactly what I've put up there" he says quietly to himself, enjoying watching the Janitor struggle and the intern squirm "Maybe this year I wont have an intern to worry about!" Dr. Cox turns and walks away, jingling the pocketful of change he has "And to think, I've still got all these pennies to use!"

_**The End.**_


End file.
